March 24


Please Don’t Stand So Close To Me

By Celeste DeCamps

March 24, 2020

#hometogether, #socialdistancing, #toiletpaper2020

Humans are more adaptable than we give ourselves credit for. We don’t always adjust quickly but we do learn to adjust. Change isn’t easy and learning a new routine overnight can feel overwhelming. The more we understand the need to be vigilant in this pandemic the more we can safeguard ourselves and the people around us. We are not used to social distancing or staying at home for any length of time. I understand it completely. I have a new co-worker now and he won’t keep his distance. He keeps eating everything I cook and I have no one to report him to. (Just kidding honey, I love you). 

As tough as this is, I want to share some ideas that may help keep the stress and anxiety down for all of us. Our future is uncertain and it feels like our lives have been put on hold but we can make the best of it. Wow, that does not sound like a very good pep talk at all. We can get through this as long as we stick together. Not actually stick. We need to keep some serious distance from each other. Let me try again. We should make sure we have all the supplies needed to be able to stay at home. You may see some really long lines at the gun store. Don’t worry. All those people are going to make sure their supply of toilet paper will be kept safe. 

I could be wrong but I never saw toilet paper necessary for my survival. I was always led to believe it was food. The one good thing about being a picky eater is that I can live off of peanut butter for the rest of my life. As much as I love Jif, I didn’t buy cases of it. That would be selfish. I did buy a lot of bullets though. You know, to protect the jars of peanut butter I did buy.

Being home gives us a chance to do our spring cleaning. I’m finding that all the stuff I want to get rid of doesn’t belong to me. For some reason my husband wants to keep his things even though I have no use for any of it. It’s okay though because this is a great opportunity to communicate with each other. Right now we are not speaking. Instead we are practicing social distancing There’s so much this pandemic is teaching us. 

We are all in this together. This is a challenging time but no one should feel alone in it. Except for that awful woman who took boxes and boxes of paper goods all for herself. Let’s do our best to be there for each other but not physically there. Skype, Zoom or call. Please don’t show up at my door. I don’t have enough peanut butter to share with you but I will throw you a couple of rolls of paper towels. 

About the author

Celeste DeCamps has a B.A. in Communications from the University of Miami. She worked in radio and television, was a professional belly dancer, drummer, percussionist, nightclub owner, and a sales rep for Southern Wine and Spirits for 12 years. Throughout her different career moves, speaking to and teaching women how to be more confident is Celeste's most fulfilling job.

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  1. OMG, Celeste!! You are so right and so funny. But you are so lucky to be married to an amazing magician who can keep you entertained for hours on end (Some sarcasm, but seriously, as far as husbands/coworkers/cohabitators go Eric is a pretty good one). Let’s continue never seeing each other through this crisis. BTW, I have to confess I bought 2 jars of peanut butter even though I almost never eat it…but that’s not hoarding is it?

    1. Thank you, Jennifer. I appreciate you taking the time to read my article. Yes, I’m very lucky to have Eric and no 2 jars of peanut butter are hardly hoarding. At least I don’t think so. HaHa. Take Care!

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